Internal Dialogue

Self-Judgement hurts… Think about those wiggly jiggly bits you judge.You know what I’m talking about all those body parts that aren’t quite right. Men, you do this too!

As a specialist in the field of Body-Image and Self-Image, I have not only personally experienced the harshness of self-judgement, I have seen the effects in clients and in the general population. Somehow it seems to be “normal” to say I am fat. Or to say I have a spare tire, look at my thighs they are so big. Pick a body part and you could pick it apart. It’s either too big, too small, not the right shape. For men it might be I’m too slim, too short, don’t have enough hair.What if I was to tell you that this was not only damaging your self-esteem it is damaging your body. Think about it, your body is like any living thing and responds to words. What might your words be doing to it?

”Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. Do you remember that saying? Boy is that a big fat lie

The words you tell yourself affect your self-image. The words you use on yourself are more important than the words you use on others. I wonder what someone would say if you walked up to them and said man you look fat in that. Or you are not worthy of that, and what you have to offer has no value. Chances are you might get a big slap in the face. This is what you are doing to yourself constantly.Maybe it’s time for you to look at your mantras (the things you repeat over and over about yourself) and change them to something positive.” When you change your inner world, you change your outer world”.

Words carry and energy to heal or harm. This is not something to take lightly and I am begging you quit tearing yourself down. Your body is completely neutral and is not the “problem”. Check out this study on the effects of water, what does your body mainly consist of? Click to watch WATER. Dr.Emoto is brilliant, google his water studies they are eye opening.

How do you stop negative self-talk?

Stop, Reset, Start over. This is a process I developed to stop my own mental gremlins, and I teach this to my clients. Here’s the deal we all have bad times so it’s good to have a quick process to go to.

STOPis exactly that, say it out loud, internally, whatever it works for you to command that voice to STOP!! You can even use a physical cue like a finger grab (make sure it is the same cue each time) When I started doing this over ten years ago,  I used a very thick elastic band on my wrist each time those negative words and thoughts came in I snapped it. Let me tell you by the end of the day my wrist was red and raw. It was a good physical reminder of what I was doing to myself mentally, and spiritually. Make your own signal or sign that you have busted that little gremlin!

Now is time to RESET– Reset is love and gratitude. Be thankful for whatever body part or part of your image you have been picking apart.Gratitude for the body is something that I think everyone can benefit from. Gratitude is a life changer and will completely turn your life around, so do it every day like any habit it takes practice. Below a picture of water with the word thank-you from Dr. Emoto’s study. Very different from the one at the top of this blog. Think what gratitude can do for your body if you are needing more health and vibrancy commit to the practice of gratitude.

LOVE – When you express self-love it completely changes your thoughts, your life, your health, and wellness. You can not change anything through hatred so if you are hating on yourself you will be stuck in the place of self-judgement, sadness, and lacking self-confidence. Replace your negative self-talk with positive self-affirmations. I am healthy, I am strong, I am vibrant, I am beautiful, I am:::::

START OVER – Sounds easy right? So many of us humans don’t give ourselves the permission to wipe the slate clean and begin again. If you just had a binge moment, you can’t take it back. Beating yourself will definitely make it worse so just move forward and let go. It is a good idea to make a mental note if you are aware of the “trigger”, so you can learn from it.You may choose to write it down. It is good to know why you went down the negative bunny trail.  Self-Image is viewed in three different ways. How you see yourself, how others see you, and how you perceive others see you. You can change the way you see yourself, you can change the way you think others see you, this really is about how you feel about yourself. Lastly how others see you is their perception it has nothing to do with you.

Your self -image is a governor of your life, it rules what you think you are capable of. Having a poor self-image will prevent you from taking the steps to live the life you deserve. Improve your self-image change your life. – Chantel Schmidt, Owner & Founder of Equine Reflection

Until next time remember to be kind to yourself.